When the Flame Flickers: A Gentle Conversation About Burnout

Stressed at work.

There’s a kind of tiredness that sleep doesn’t fix. A heaviness that settles into your bones, even after you’ve “rested.” A fog that follows you from room to room, making everything feel louder, heavier, and harder than it should.

That’s burnout. And I know it far too well.

People often think burnout comes from doing too much, and in many ways, it does. But it also comes from carrying too much, caring too much, and trying too hard for too long without a place to set it all down.

Burnout happens quietly. It sneaks in through the small cracks. Through the days when you tell yourself, “I’ll rest later. “I can’t slow down yet. “Everything will fall apart if I stop.”

You don’t notice it at first. You just feel… off. Then fragile. Then empty. Then suddenly you’re standing in the kitchen, staring into the fridge, overwhelmed by the decision of what to eat because your brain, your heart, and your body have all checked out at the same time.

I’ve been there. More than once.

Burnout doesn’t just drain your energy. It drains your sense of self.

When I’m burned out, I feel disconnected from myself, like I’m watching my life from the outside. I move through the day, but none of it feels rooted. Nothing feels like “me.”

And yet… I still try to push. I still try to perform. I still try to hold everything together because that’s what I’ve always done.

It took me a long time to understand something important:

Burnout isn’t a personal failure. It’s a sign you’ve been strong for too long without enough support, softness, or space to recover.

Burnout isn’t weakness. It’s a whisper: “Something needs to change, and you deserve help.”

The Hardest Part of Burnout? Admitting You’re Burning Out.

We live in a world that glorifies productivity, hustle, and constant output. Slowing down feels rebellious. Rest feels irresponsible. Saying “I need a moment” can feel like admitting defeat.

But burnout asks for honesty. It asks for softness. It asks for a little bit of truth whispered in the dark: “I’m not okay right now, and that deserves care.”

The moment you can say that, even to yourself, something begins to shift.

What Burnout Feels Like (Even When You Hide It Well)

For me, burnout looks like:

• Feeling tired no matter how much I sleep

• Losing motivation for things I normally love

• Snapping easily

• Wanting to be alone but also feeling lonely

• Staring at tasks for too long

• Forgetting simple things

• Feeling emotionally flat

• Wanting to cry for no clear reason

And underneath all of it, this sense of carrying a weight that nobody else can see.

If any of that sounds familiar, you’re not alone, and nothing is wrong with you. You’re human, and you’ve been trying very hard.

Burnout Needs Gentleness, Not Grit

You don’t push your way out of burnout. You don’t hustle out of it. You don’t shame yourself out of it.

You soften your way out.

You give yourself permission to:

• Rest

• Pause

• Step back

• Say “not today.”

• Ask for help

• Nourish the parts of you that feel empty

You don’t have to rebuild your entire life overnight. Just begin with one small moment of grace.

A Free Gentle Recovery Guide

Because I know how hard it is to climb out of burnout when you can barely think straight, I created a soft, simple reflection sheet, a Gentle Burnout Recovery Guide, to help you slow down enough to understand what your mind, heart, and body need.

It’s not overwhelming. It’s not clinical. It’s not another “to-do.”

It’s just a quiet place to rest and reconnect with yourself.

You can download it here.

One Last Thing

If you’re in burnout right now, here’s the truth I want you to hold:

You are not behind. You are not failing. You are not “too much” or “not enough.” You are tired. And tired people deserve rest, not judgment.

You get to come back to yourself slowly. You get to rebuild your spark at your own pace. You get to recover gently.

I’m right here walking with you.

P.S. Since you're here, check out our weekly reflection page. It's updated every Sunday for the new week ahead to give you a little extra love and motivation. And subscribe to the email list if you'd like soft motivation in your inbox!